Relationships: lesbian, gay, bi, heterosexual couples
Conflict in Cyberspace: How To Resolve Conflict Online
Have you ever noticed how conflict can get blown out of proportion online? What may begin as a small difference of opinion, or misunderstanding, becomes a major issue very quickly...
Break-ups: How To Survive Them
The loss of a relationship can be incredibly hard...
Getting Past the Arguments
One of the hardest things to handle in a relationship is conflict...
Bringing Out the Best in Your Relationship
Relationships bring out the best and the worst in us...
Regain the Romance and Sparkle in Your Relationship
If only relationships could be as exciting and romantic as when we first met...
Sex, Lies, Affairs, and Relationships
Have you ever had a strong desire to have sex with someone other than your partner...
Women's Sexual Expression
Have you ever wondered whether other women, lesbian or straight, have problems with sex?
What Is The Mood Of Your Relationship?
If you were to think about the present state of your relationship
(or a point in time in a past relationship) as a mood, how would you
describe the mood of your relationship?
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 Lesbian and Gay
 Am I Gay Because of The Abuse?
One of the most frequently asked questions I hear from lesbian and gay sexual abuse survivors is "Am I gay because of the abuse?...
To Come Out or Not to Come Out: That is the Question
Coming out is often talked about as something that is not only healthy for us, but our political duty...
Lesbian Relationships - Talking About Our Relationships
At one time or another most of us have heard or spoken the juicy words, "guess who so-and-so is seeing?"
Lesbian Dating: Life Before the Uhaul
Why is it that lesbians have such a hard time with dating?
Lesbian Couples and Friends: Is There Enough Love To Go Around?
Why is it that lesbians can neglect or forget their friends when they get into a relationship?
Talking About Lesbian Partner Abuse
Many of us, when we first come out, are drawn to the lesbian community with the dream of finding an all-embracing, welcoming community...
Are Some Lesbians Attracted to Men?
Do you think that it is possible to be lesbian and sexually attracted to men?
Male-to-Male Child Sexual Abuse in the Context of Homophobia
an article for male survivors and their friends and families
Remember growing up and hearing the word "pervert"?
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Incest, Sexual and Ritual Abuse, Emotional Abuse:
Articles for Survivors and Their Friends
Sexual Feelings During Abuse
Many sexual abuse survivors have trouble dealing with the fact that their body was sexually stimulated and felt aroused during the abuse. They may feel guilty and ashamed...
Am I Gay Because of The Abuse?
One of the most frequently asked questions I hear from lesbian and gay sexual abuse survivors is "Am I gay because of the abuse?...
Female Perpetrators and Male Sexual Abuse Victims:
Society's Betrayal of Boys
The reality that boys are sexually abused by women is not widely accepted. Some people view it as an impossible act - that a male can't be sexually assaulted by a female - and others view it as sexually titillating...
Mother-Daughter Sexual Abuse: A Painful Topic
Sexual abuse perpetrated by mothers on their daughters is an uncomfortable subject for many people...
Incest and Child Sexual Abuse: Definitions, Perpetrators, Victims, and Effects
Child sexual abuse (and incest) is any form of sexual activity with a child.
It may include showing a child...
Sexual Abuse Survivors and Sex
an article about becoming more comfortable with sex
Many sexual abuse survivors struggle to have positive and enjoyable sex lives...
Trusting Your Memories of Sexual Abuse
an article for survivors
It can take a long time for survivors to be able to say that they know for sure that they were sexually abused...
Male-to-Male Child Sexual Abuse in the Context of Homophobia
an article for male survivors and their friends and families
Remember growing up and hearing the word "pervert"?
The Treatment Needs of Sexually Abused Men
an article for therapists
Men who have been sexually abused as children often feel a great sense of isolation...
DID, MPD, or Multiplicity: Responding to Parts Inside With a Focus on the Kids
an article for multiples and their friends and families
Having parts inside can be challenging, but it can also be inspiring and wonderful...
After September 11: Learning to cope
Since the attacks, many people have felt as though they are holding their breath, anticipating the worse, and are seeing the world through fearful and untrusting eyes...
Coping with the Attacks of Sept. 11
for sexual abuse survivors and people with mental health problems
Have you been feeling unsafe, panicky, or afraid to go outside since the attacks?
Are you crying a lot, cutting more, or has your eating disorder been aggravated...
Emotional Abuse
the most common form of abuse
Emotional abuse is the most common form of abuse - and yet least talked about...
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Ritual Abuse - Definitions, Glossary, The Use of Mind Control
The report of the Ritual Abuse Task Force Los Angeles County Commission For Women
March 15, 1991.
This article may be triggering for some people.
Ritual abuse is a brutal form of abuse of children, adolescents, and adults, consisting of physical, sexual, and psychological abuse, and involving the use of rituals. Ritual does not necessarily mean satanic...
Indicators of a Ritual Abuse History
from a study by Caren Cook, 1991
This article may be triggering for some people.
One question in this study asked survivors to note any clues or indicators in their lives that may have suggested they were ritually abused as a child. The lists below organize these responses into meaningful categories...
Programming: Understanding, Recognizing, & Nullifying It
By Cheryl Rainfield
This article may be triggering for some people.
Programming involves a message or series of messages...
Common Programs
Observed in Survivors of Satanic Ritualistic Abuse
by David W. Neswald, M.A. M.F.C.C. in collaboration with Catherine Gould, Ph.D. and Vicki Graham-Costain
This article may be triggering for some people.
"...it is becoming increasingly clear that perhaps the most demanding treatment
aspects of such cases concern the problems posed by what is known
as cult programming..."
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Emotions/Feelings
We Need Our Feelings
Do you struggle with knowing and accepting how you feel?
It may be the most common problem there is, and yet the single
most important thing to learn...
Stories About Ourselves
From the day we are born, and throughout our lives, we are
told stories about ourselves. These stories tell us what
happened to us; what we're like; what our families are like...
The Inner Critic: Accepting Ourselves
Do you feel like you're your worst critic? Do you find yourself criticizing your body,
intelligence, clothes, ability to do your job, and just about anything about yourself...
Feelings: Knowing How You Feel
how your body can help you
Identifying how you feel can sometimes be confusing. You know that you're feeling something, but may not know exactly what. To start...
Conflict in Cyberspace: How To Resolve Conflict Online
Have you ever noticed how conflict can get blown out of proportion online? What may begin as a small difference of opinion, or misunderstanding, becomes a major issue very quickly...
Optimism: How To Avoid Negative Thinking
Have you ever wondered why some people feel down and defeated when faced with difficult situations, while others feel challenged and hopeful...
Coping With The Holiday Season: Being True to Your Heart
It's that time of year again - the holiday season. For some people, the holidays are filled with love and positive memories, and for others they are filled with grief, painful memories, and even violence...
People Pleasing - Having Trouble Saying No?
Do you have trouble saying NO? Do you do things for other people but almost never
ask
anybody to do things for you...
What to Do With Your Feelings
Intense emotion can be overwhelming for all of us...
Overcoming Depression: Brightening the Winter Blues
A lot of people get depressed this time of year...
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Therapy & Healing
Therapy and Healing: Am I Getting Any Better?
Do you feel like you've been working on your healing for what
feels like a million years and still see no end to your pain
in sight?...
Body Image/Issues With Food
Changing Your Body Image
an article about accepting your body.
Many people think body image is only an issue for people who aren't stereotypically thin...
Body Image: Living In Our Bodies
I have yet to meet a woman who, at some point in her life, has not felt discomfort with the size or appearance of some aspect of her body...
Addictions
Staying Free of Alcohol & Drugs
For many people, getting off alcohol and other drugs is not the hardest part of overcoming an addiction...
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Inspirational
The Inner Critic: Accepting Ourselves
Do you feel like you're your worst critic? Do you find yourself criticizing your body,
intelligence, clothes, ability to do your job, and just about anything about yourself...
The Pursuit of Happiness
Everyone wants to be happy, but not everyone knows how to recognize and stay with it; they're always looking for more...
Dream Yourself Into Your Life
Too often we lose sight of what's important to us for example, enjoying nature,
exploring our spirituality, connecting with friends, traveling, and being creative...
Optimism: How To Avoid Negative Thinking
Have you ever wondered why some people feel down and defeated when faced with difficult situations, while others feel challenged and hopeful...
Online Therapy
Myths and Realities of Online Clinical Work
An article by the Third Clinical Case Study Group of the International Society for Mental Health Online
...Through this paper, we hope to illuminate the potential for online clinical work, and to share our evolving understanding of what is truly possible, despite the prevalent myths and realities which shape our thinking about online "therapy" and the nature of Internet-facilitated communication and behavior...
Healing Words Newsletter
by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist
Healing Words, Vol. 14, December, 2004
Healing Words, Vol. 13, June, 2004
Healing Words, Vol. 12, Nov., 2003
Healing Words, Vol. 11, Dec., 2002
Healing Words, Vol. 10, Sept., 2002
Healing Words, Vol. 9, May, 2002
Healing Words, Vol. 8, February, 2002
Healing Words, Vol. 7, December, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 6, October, 2001
Healing Words, Sept. 11 Special Issue, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 5, August, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 4, June, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 3, April, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 2, February, 2001
Healing Words, Vol. 1, January, 2001
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By other authors, available on the web:
What To Do When You Feel Like Hurting Yourself
by Cheryl Rainfield
An excellent article about self-harm that includes many strategies for not hurting yourself.
The Body Keeps the Score: Memory and the Evolving Psychobiology of Posttraumatic Stress
by Bessel A. van der Kolk, MD.
An excellent article about traumatic memories and the body.
Dissociation and the Fragmentary Nature of Traumatic memories: Overview and Exploratory Study.
by Bessel A. van der Kolk & Rita Fisler
An excellent article about the fragmentary nature of traumatic memories.
The Invisible Boy
by Frederick Mathews, Ph.D., C. Psych.
You and I Equal Respect: The Formula For Fair Fighting
by Lynne Namka, Ed. D.
Whoosh! The One Thirtieth Of A Second Reaction Of Anger
by Lynne Namka, Ed. D.
Clinical Considerations in Working With Gay and Lesbian Sexual Abuse Survivors
by Jim Struve, LCSW
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